Hijinks in Hazzard
by LAGC
Summary: The A-team meets some good ole boys, put away the bad guys, and twist the authorities into knots. A CROSSOVER style story that mixes The A-Team with the Dukes of Hazzard.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer** : I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to drop some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Story Summary: The A-team meets some good ole boys, put away the bad guys, and twist The authorities into knots.

Chapter Summary: The A-Team meets with distractions and destruction in Hazzard County.

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 1: Down in a Ditch**

"Faceman where ARE we?" bellowed BA from the drivers seat as he drove down a rural highway. Hannibal turned and stared expectantly at Face. His Lieutenant was wrestling the map from Murdock's grip.

"Come on Buddy let me try." he pleaded and Murdock finally relented. One glance and a raised eyebrow later Faceman had solved the problem.

"Murdock, you were holding the map upside down." Face revealed in a sigh.

"Oh but I like it better that way. All the squiggly lines make prettier pictures when North is down and South is up." explained Murdock. Hannibal snickered.

"I'm gonna put your south end up top of your north end FOOL! Now we are lost thanks to your foolishness!" growled the Big Guy.

"Give me a minute BA I'll figure out where we are. We just saw a sign for Route 61 right. So ok in Murdock Land that would have been Route 19. Oh here we are. We are in Hazzard County."

"Hazzard County?! What state is that in!?"

Before Face could reply to BA, Hannibal hollered, "Look out BA that orange car is coming straight at us!'

Both the van and the speeding car swerved at the exact last moment. The car kept going but the van careened off the hard pack dirt road and down into a deep gully. The A-team was stuck. As Hannibal checked on the status of his troops they heard a police car race past, siren blaring., Luckily, the same ditch that had conquered them, also concealed them from the authorities.

BA was fuming as he and his unhurt comrades filed out of the van to check for damages. A headlight was shattered, a fender flare was shredded, but more alarmingly the front drivers side tire was torn off. BA vented his fury by kicking at a mud pile until it was a swirling dust cloud.

"Can you fix it Sergeant?" inquired Hannibal in his efficient command tone, waving his cigar.

"Of course I can fix it, Hannibal. But not here and not without the parts."

"Ok Face, you're up." chirped Hannibal, a challenge in his tone. Murdock, clutching the tool box, flashed a goading grin at his buddy.

Face opened his mouth to protest and complain but was quickly distracted by a vision of pure southern loveliness in a red tank top and curve hugging cutoffs at the top of the gully.

Seeing his blue eyes widen drastically the other men also directed their gazes upward.

"Nice." hummed Hannibal, "I can see why you lost your train of thought, Lieutenant."

Murdock was already making his way up the slope as the young woman called out, "Well hello Fellers. Looks like y'all could use some help."

"Oh she has no idea." whispered Face. Hannibal patted him on the shoulder and together they climbed up to the road. BA begrudgingly followed.

"Hi there! I'm Daisy Duke. My cousins Bo and Luke called me up on the radio after they ran you off the road. They're awful sorry. Since they couldn't stop cuz of ole Rosco and Cletus they sent me over to offer some neighborly help."

"Well Miss Duke. I'm Hannibal Smith. The man next to you is HM Murdock. This tongue tied sports coat wearing guy is Templeton Peck, and Mr Grouchy over there is BA Baracus."

Murdock tipped his hat, BA nodded, and Face finally unleashed his killer smile, then with an appreciative glance, shook Daisy's hand.

Daisy looked down at the van and noticed its crippled wheel. "Oh you guys are going to need a full tow truck. I'll get on the airwaves and call out Cooter. He'll be here in a jiffy." Before any of the men could utter a word, she reached into her jeep, grabbed her CB mike and sent out her call.

"Crazy Cooter will be out there faster than a bloodhound can find its tail." A manic, gravelly voice replied.

BA rolled his eyes dramatically. The idea of a person- calling himself Crazy Cooter-mixing it up with their own Captain of Looniness, did nothing to improve his mood or outlook.

True to his word the tow truck guy was there in under ten minutes. He and BA made short work of extracting the van from the ditch. Luckily it had landed with the front end facing upward toward the road. Once everything was secure and on the road, Cooter began to discuss where he should tow the van.

"I can take you back to my garage in town, but parking is a bit of an issue cuz both my bays are filled up with Rosco _'s_ and Enos's patrol cars."

"Oh Cooter, don't be silly. Bring them back to the farm. We at least owe them supper after what Bo and Luke did." Daisy directed.

The A-team shared relieved nods and Hannibal accepted Daisy's gracious offer. Face quickly called shotgun in the Jeep. BA opted to ride with Cooter to keep an eye on his beloved van. Hannibal and Murdock climbed into the Jeep's backseat. Face had the decency to cringe under Hannibal's withering glance as his commander climbed into the small rear bench.

On the ride over to the Duke farm. Daisy explained that she, as well as her cousins Bo and Luke, lived there with their Uncle Jesse. "I'm so sorry that y'all got caught in the crossfire between my Cousins and Sheriff Rosco. Locals 'round here are used to it and know to git outta the way as soon as they see the General. But you guys were caught off guard I'm sure."

"The General?" Face trepidatiously aske All three men were now worried about encountering Army brass.

"Yep, The General Lee, that's Bo and Luke's car." Daisy replied brightly.

"Oh we understand, Miss Duke." replied Hannibal with a subtle sigh of relief.

"Oh just call me Daisy. We're all friends now. I hope you men like fried chicken. That's what I was cooking up when the Boys sent me out to rescue you."

"That sounds delicious, Daisy." Face purred bestowing a dazzling grateful smile upon her. Murdock rolled his eyes in the backseat.

"Tell me Daisy might there be corn on the cob to go with that fried chicken." Murdock eagerly asked a bit of his Texan drawl escaping.

"There will be as soon as someone shucks it so I can boil it."

"Oh Faceman and I will be happy to do that for you. Won't we Face?""

"Uh, ya sure Murdock. Unless of course Daisy needs some help directly in the kitchen, then I'd be happy to help there instead."

"Oh I'm all set in the kitchen. The corn is a in a basket on the back porch you can have at it."

Five minutes later the small caravan pulled into the Duke's driveway. Free ranging chickens cackled and fled as Daisy and Cooter pulled up to the house. Cooter told her that he was going to deposit the van in the barn immediately. He had to turn down her dinner invite because he had orders from Boss Hogg to get the patrol cars fixed so his "two dipstick lawmen can get their sorry behinds back on patrol." Daisy laughed heartily at his spot on impression of Boss.

Uncle Jesse came ambling up from behind the house, a big smile on his bearded face and a shotgun held loosely in his right hand. The A-team automatically assembled around Hannibal at this sight. They quickly eased as they heard Jesse's warm greeting, "Now Daisy who are these here city slickers? Are these the fellers that Bo and Luke radioed about?'

"Yes sir, Uncle Jesse. Let me introduce Hannibal Smith, Templeton Peck, HM Murdock, and BA Baracus."

"Well Hello and welcome. Sorry my boys caused you some trouble. I'm Jesse Duke." The men all exchanged handshakes after Jesse passed his gun to Daisy.

Just then a familiar orange car pulled into the yard. Everyone turned to look (with varying ranges of welcome) at the arrivals. The Duke Boys shimmied out of the General Lee's windows and strode over to the assembled group.

Luke extended his hand and apologized, "Hi. I'm Luke and I sure am sorry that Bo and I caused you men to slide off Miller's Creek Road. Those ditches are deep." Hannibal shook it then Bo's hand.

"Yeah did the slide cause much damage to your van?" Bo asked.

"Yeah it cause enough. Busted a headlight, a fender, and torn my front wheel off. Tow truck guy left my van in your barn." rumbled BA as he accepted their handshakes.

Murdock had wandered over to the General, fascinated by how the Dukes had exited it. He tried the door handle to no avail.

"The doors are welded shut. It's a racing requirement. Luke and I plan on joining the race circuit just as soon as Uncle Jesse can spare us from the farm." Bo enthusiastically explained.

Bo and Luke went off to the barn with BA to assess the damages to the van. Daisy pointed out the basket of corn and Murdock bounced over to the task with a petulant Faceman in tow. Uncle Jesse took Hannibal on a tour of the homestead and gave him a condensed history of the Duke clan. Hannibal briefly explained that he and the guys had been a unit in Viet Nam and were now business partners.

Very soon Daisy, now wearing an endearing white sundress, called out from the porch to summon everyone in for supper. Face and Murdock were already at the table when the others piled into the house. Once everyone was seated Uncle Jesse said the blessing and requested a bit of extra forgiveness on his nephews for recklessly driving weary travelers off the road earlier that day. Hannibal smothered a snicker and the nephews in question winced sheepishly.

"Everyone dig in!" Jesse instructed after his hearty Amen.

And that's exactly what they all did. Everyone was truly enjoying the meal and relaxing in the warm hospitality of the Dukes. Then they heard a car rolling up to the house.

"That's Enos's patrol car. Cooter sure works fast. What's he doing here?" Daisy said just before Enos's knock rattled the screen door.

Hannibal flashed his "play it cool" look to all his men as Daisy allowed Enos into the kitchen.

"Well what can we do for you Enos?" asked Uncle Jesse while offering him a drumstick.

The deputy eagerly accepted the chicken and smiled bashfully.

"Sorry to bother you at supper Uncle Jesse but I ...well I was...was hoping to ask Daisy something."

"Well stop your stammering, son, and have out with it." instructed Jesse

"Um um, Daisy, um would you... um, like to do me the honor of being my, well going with me to...to the County Policeman Ball next Saturday night?"

"Why, Enos Straight, are you asking me out on a date, honey?" Daisy drawled flirtatiously.

'Well...yes...I guess I am...if thats ok?"

"Well it sure is Sugar. I'd be right happy to go with you to your ball. Pick me up at seven?"

"Gee Thanks Daisy. I sure will. Thanks again and this here chicken leg is delicious."

Enos stumbled backwards out the door. His gleeful boyish smile nearly reaching the brim of his deputy hat which he put back on as he exited.

The meal continued peacefully after Enos's departure. Everyone decided to have dessert out on the porch to enjoy the cool night air. Once the apple pie and ice cream had been devoured the Duke Boys and the A-team Boys headed into the house to help set up the extra beds needed to accommodate them. Jesse had insisted they stay at the farm until their van could be fixed. Jesse turned to Hannibal who was enjoying a post meal cigar.

"So Hannibal do you want to tell me why you all looked like long tail cats in a room full of rocking chairs when Deputy Straight showed up?"


	2. Chapter 2 Down on the Farm

**CHAPTER 2**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Chapter Summary: The A-team and the Dukes get to know each other better.

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 2: Down on the Farm**

Hannibal looked guardedly at Uncle Jesse, assessing his options. Jesse casually leaned against his chair back, waiting on his guest's response. After a lifetime spent dependent upon his abilities to instantly read a person and situation, Hannibal followed his instincts and opted to trust Mr. Duke.

"Well the Law isn't always our companion, Jesse. They have a misinformed opinion of my Team which stems from a mistake made by a military court back in 1972. My men and I have spent the last decade trying to find a way to rectify that problem."

Jesse Duke, also a man of keen instincts, sized up Hannibal and replied, "That's not a problem, we Dukes have been having trouble with the law since the days we were born. We just keep doing what's right and what needs to get done."

"That's pretty much what my Team and I do."

Hannibal went on to explain that they hire themselves out to people who have problems that they can't handle or deal with in the standard ways. They were on their way back to the west coast from their last job outside Atlanta, but thanks to Murdock's creative map reading they had wound up in a ditch in Hazzard County. Jesse assured Hannibal that Cooter would have their parts in no time and that between BA, Bo, and Luke they'd have the van fixed in even less time. Jesse also insisted that housing them at the farm was no imposition at all.

"If it gets too crowded in the house Bo and Luke can just sleep out in the barn since it was their bullheadedness that caused the van damage in the first place." Jesse concluded.

The next morning Hannibal awoke to the scent of bacon sizzling on the stove top. Face and BA roused a minute later. They entered the kitchen just as Bo and Luke tumbled back inside with fresh eggs from the coop and apples from the fruit cellar. Hannibal looked around for Murdock.

"HM is out in the barn milking the cow." Jesse explained.

"What's that Fool know about milking cows?" BA mumbled to Hannibal.

"Ah we should all know by now not to underestimate Murdock's repertoire of skills." Hannibal consoled.

The Team quickly gathered themselves up. Face called dibs on the bathroom and set off to get ready for the day. Jesse put Hannibal and BA to work peeling the apples so he could fry them up. Murdock and Daisy strolled in with a full pail of milk.

"Uncle Jesse look at all the milk that ole cow gave us. Murdock must have magic hands or he just sweet talked that cow into being extra generous today. I'm going to set it over here so that it can separate. I want to make chocolate cream pie for tonight's dessert."

After their fortifying meal, Luke drove BA to Cooters garage to acquire the parts they'd need to fix the van. They left in Jesse's truck since BA flat out refused to climb into the General Lee like "some slippery eel." Murdock had no such reservations about the General so he and Bo set off for the crash site. During the night a very unhappy Big Guy had realized that they left his tool box behind.

Hannibal and Face went to the barn to straighten up the interior of the tossed around van. They also wanted to assess if there had been any damage done to their arsenal. They hoped to do this in private, but had no such luck. As Face was inspecting the last rifle Jesse appeared.

"Seems to me that you need to tell me the rest of your story, Hannibal. My boys are on probation and a big clause of that probation is no guns other than my hunting rifle."

They were caught dead to rights. Face and Hannibal looked at each other, Face gave a shrug that meant "Go ahead, Colonel."

"All right, Jesse, you deserve the whole story. What I told you yesterday was all true but a bit watered down. In '72 we were wrongly convicted of robbing the Bank of Hanoi. We were operating under direct orders but our commanding officer was killed during a strike on our base and couldn't corroborate our story. We escaped from Bragg and have been on the run since. To pay the bills, and pass the time, like I said yesterday, we hire ourselves out to help innocent people solve problems. Some of these missions require that we defend ourselves and our clients. We are called the A-team."

"The A-team? What brings you to Hazzard County?"

"We just helped a reverend in Arcadia stop a thug from poisoning his parishioners with illegal and unscrupulously made corn whiskey. We were headed back Calufornia but then Murdock:s creative map reading put us in the path of Bo and Luke." replied Hannibal.

"Poisonous 'shine eh? A still made out of oil barrels?" asked Jesse

"Pretty much." answered Face.

"People have no morals now. Making 'shine used to be a time honored family tradition. Now its becoming ...well I don't even have words for it." spat Jesse. "Make sure those guns stay out of sight and locked tight. All we need is Roscoe seeing them and he and Boss Hogg will toss Bo and Luke into such a deep cell we wont be able to find them."

"We certainly will." assured Hannibal.

"Who are Roscoe and Boss Hogg?" asked Faceman.

"Roscoe is our bumbling sheriff and Boss is the guy who runs the county, and especially Roscoe."

Face and Hannibal nodded understandingly.

Just then Daisy called out from the porch, "Uncle Jesse! Uncle Jesse! We've got a problem!"

The three men hurried up to the house. Daisy met them in the driveway.

"Bo and Murdock got arrested by Roscoe. I just heard it over the CB radio."

"Oh dagnabbit why on Earth did Roscoe do that? Well go get the egg money. Sounds like we have to go make bail again." grumbled Jesse

"Already did." said Daisy as she glided behind the wheel of her jeep. Jesse joined her. Face and Hannibal followed suit.

 **Copyright disclosure:**

" _Jesse Duke, ... , " That's not a problem, we Dukes have been having trouble with the law since the days we were born. ..."._

This phrase is clearly recognizable as part of the theme song to The Dukes of Hazzard. The theme was written and performed by Waylon Jennings. Publisher: Warner/Chappell Music, Inc


	3. Ch 3 Jailhouse Jumps and Covert Crates

**CHAPTER 3**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Just wanted to note: **Happy Anniversary** to The Dukes of Hazzard. January marked the **40th** Anniversary of the show which first aired on January 26,1979.

Chapter Summary: The A-team and Dukes bond in the face of a common threat.

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 3: Jailhouse Jumps and Covert Crates**

"Listen, you! I'm tryin' to cuff and stuff you! Will you be still so that I can get your finger prints!" exclaimed an exasperated Rosco P. Coltrane.

"Rosco! If you'd just listen to us you won't even need his prints." reasoned Bo from his jail cell.

Meanwhile Murdock continued to squirm and shimmy in what appeared to be a rendition of the Village People's YMCA, except perhaps in lowercase letters. Finally, Rosco miraculously managed to ink up his fingers. But, just as the sheriff was about to roll his thumb across the print card, Murdock spasmed and rubbed the ink all over the front of Rosco's uniform shirt. Murdock even managed to dislodge his sheriff's badge. Rosco dove under his desk to retrieve it. Socking his head on the open ink draw in the process. Murdock took this opportunity to scoot over to Bo's cell.

"Now you just be still, ya hear!" blabbered Rosco as he reattached his badge to his smeared shirt.

Just then JD Hogg strutted into the sheriff's office and began to berate Rosco.

"Listen you Dipstick get this done quietly. I'm trying to conduct an important business call with an important person. And your jackass antics are interrupting me!"

'I'm sorry Boss. That fella there is giving me a barrel of trouble. I can't get his prints and he won't tell me his name. Ya know Boss...I don't think he's right in the head."

"Well I know YOU ain't right in YOUR head so you and him ought to be getting along just fine!" Boss bellowed as he left the booking area mumbling about having to hire Rosco "my wife's idiot brother. I shouldn't have even hired him as a dog catcher."

Murdock seized the opportunity provided by Boss"s rant to stealthily unlock Bo's jail cell. He had swiped the keys off the desk while Rosco was under it.

Still quite flustered, Rosco ordered Murdock back to the booking desk. Just as Coltrane was about to resume the printing battle, Bo let loose a gasping, horrifying cough and flung himself toward the cell bars. Both Rosco and Murdock spun to face him. Bo was now clinging to the bars but seamed to be collapsing with each gasp.

"I think he's choking to death! Do something Sheriff!" Murdock frantically yelled.

Both men rushed over to the cell. As soon as they got close enough, Bo lunged out of the unlocked door. Completely startled, Rosco was easy pickings for Murdock to shove him into the now empty cell. The pilot used his pilfered keys to lock the bewildered lawman in. Then he and Bo hightailed it for the exit.

They made it to the curb just as Daisy was pulling up in her loaded down jeep. Bo jumped onto the running board and clung to the roll bar, Murdock did the exact same thing on the passenger side. Daisy wasted no time speeding away from the jailhouse. Daisy didn't slow down until she turned off the main road onto a grown over driveway.

"We can stop here for a bit. Miss Hyacynth won't mind. I think she's in Savanah visiting her niece.

"Captain, care to explain your situation?" demanded Hannibal.

"Yeah! What shenanigans did you get yourself into this time, Bo?" challenged Jesse.

"We weren't doing anything wrong." said Bo

"Seriously we weren't." added Murdock.

"We drove out to the crash site on Miller's Creek Road. We found the tool box quick enough. But it had toppled over and spilled the tools." began Bo.

"I surely didn't want to bring a half empty toolbox back to BA. No sir-ree. Not me. So we started to hunt around for the renegade implements." interrupted Murdock.

"Hunting around brought us down the gully near the creek. Suddenly Rosco pops out from behind a stand of trees. Gun waving, accusing us of grand theft of mechanics equipment. He wouldn't even let us explain that they were BA's tools. He just pointed his pistol and herded us into his patrol car." Bo explained

"Heck he didn't even confiscate the toolbox. It's still out at the crash site. The Big Guy is not going to be happy if he doesn't get his tools back. He doesn't sleep right without having that box tucked in with him like a steel teddy bear." Murdock rambled.

"Rosco ain't the brightest bulb in the lamp, but even he should have understood the situation." complained Jesse.

'Why would he even care about a lonely tool box?" queried Face.

"Why was he lurking in those trees? It's not like he could run even a speed trap from down there." Bo mused.

"Well one thing is clear we need to go get BAs toolbox. So it looks like we will be heading back there right now." declared Hannibal.

Everyone agreed to this. Bo pointed out that the General Lee was probably still out there too. Jesse decreed that Bo and Murdock needed to lie low for a bit and besides there wasn't enough room for them in the jeep anyway. So the plan was that the escapees would hide out in Miss Hyacynth's barn until nightfall. Daisy would fetch them after her shift at the Boar's Nest.

On the way to the crash site Daisy radioed Luke and told him to meet them there. By the time BA and Luke showed up, the precious tool box was safely in Daisy's jeep. Explanations were provided when Luke and the Big Guy joined the group down at Rosco's tree stand. Everyone began to look for clues as to why he'd been there.

"Uncle Jesse, look at these tire tracks." Luke called out.

"Looks like ATV tracks to me. High power ones." BA stated.

"At least two sets, maybe three." added Face. He and Hannibal followed them deeper into the copse.

"Well, well, look at what we have here." whistled Hannibal. Everyone gathered around with awe.

In front of them was a pile of empty shipping crates. Each of them was marked with addresses of electronics stores. Rosco's county issued sheriff's hat was perched atop the closest crate. Face and Luke searched them for any paperwork or indications of what should be in the boxes.

Wedged between two crates was a torn slip of paper. Face retrieved and read it.

"Well, Colonel, seems like these boxes once held personal computers. One full set up per crate.' Face revealed. "Each goes for about $600 retail."

"Wow! There's at least twelve cases here." gasped Daisy.

"7,200 dollars worth" Face quickly supplied.

"Oh that Rosco and Boss Hogg are up to their conniving and crooked dealings again." Jesse sneered.

"He must have been worried that Bo and Murdock might find all this so that's why he trumped up a charge and arrested them." Luke said.

Just then everyone noticed the roar of multiple ATV engines in the distance but approaching.

"Colonel, we aren't prepared to engage unfriendlies." Faceman cautioned.

"Yea, right now we're all sitting ducks if those are the dudes from this here stash and if they're armed." admitted BA.

The group hustled back up to the vehicles. Luke took the General. BA and Jesse rode in the pickup. Hannibal, in the front passenger seat at last, travelled in the jeep with Daisy and Faceman. Everyone regrouped at the Duke Farm. Daisy had to leave for her shift at the Boar's Nest with the added task of fetching Bo and Murdock later on. The remaining five set to figuring out what to do with their newfound information. A few ideas were passed around but it was decided that no plan would be formulated until everyone was back together that night.

BA stalked off to the barn to use this time to straighten out his chaotic tool box and begin repairs on his van. Face went into the house to make some phone calls to gather more intel on the stores listed on the crates. Jesse and Luke had farm chores to see to. That left Hannibal to carry the car parts into the barn.

"I'd have gone to get those eventually, Hannibal" BA said without taking his eyes off the wrench he was polishing. Several rows of wiped clean tools were already neatly reestablished in the box. However there was still an array of tools on the workbench awaiting the Big Guys ministrations.

"What's the status of the van, Sergeant?" asked Hannibal "Doesn't seem like these are all the parts you need."

"No it ain't. Cooter had a headlight and a fender kit but the tie rods had to be ordered. Those should be in day after tomorrow. I should be able to install these parts by then. And the tie rods will take only a few hours. So three more nights here I'd say."

"That seems reasonable." replied Hannibal.

"But we're gonna stick around until we figure out what's up with all those computer boxes, aren't we Colonel?"

"Have we ever walked away from a challenge, BA? Especially when that challenge nearly got one of us arrested and finger printed?"

"Nope never have Colonel. Never have...especially once you're on the Jazz. Which you are."

"Exactly!" Hannibal said brandishing his cigar.

 **Copyright disclosure:**

The disco era song _YMCA_ was written by Victor Edward Willis & Jacques Morali

performed by The Village People.(1978)

The song was the only single released from The Village People's third studio album _Cruisin'_ (1978)


	4. Chapter 4 Snooping

**CHAPTER 4**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Chapter Summary: Our heroes seek some information

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 4: Snooping**

Round about ten o'clock the men heard Daisy's jeep pull up, within minutes she, Bo, and Murdock tumbled into the house. Greetings were exchanged then Bo and Murdock grabbed their leftover suppers out of the warming oven. Everyone gathered in the living room.

Face spoke first explaining what he had learned about the contraband computer crates.

"The crates were marked with names of three different electronics stores. All the stores were between here and Atlanta along Highway 20. After a bit of digging I found out that in the last two months, all three have reported warehouse robberies and have filed insurance claims. The chief investor in each shop is Lead Boar Incorporated, and the CEO listed is Lulu Coltrane Hogg."

"Miss Lulu?" chirped Daisy

"I'd bet the back 4O that Lulu knows nothing about any company called Lead Boar" grumbled Jesse.

"Yes Sir, Lead Boar just sounds like a sad pseudonym for Boss Hogg to me." decreed Luke.

"So you are implying that Rosco stole those computers from Boss Hogg?" asked Hannibal.

"No not at all. We are saying Boss Hogg had those computers stolen on his own orders." explained Luke.

"Hmm a classic double scam. Collect the insurance and sell the computers on the black market." said Face.

"Yes that's sounds exactly like something that no good JD would do. And he's hiding behind his sweet wife's name." added Jesse.

"So why don't we just alert the state police or the FBI?" inquired Murdock.

"Because it's Miss Lulu's name on the insurance claims. I'd breathe my last breath to say she's completely innocent of all these crooked schemes. She is nothing like her conniving husband or scoundrel brother. We can't risk her getting tangled up in all this." declared Jesse.

"Coltrane-Hogg? Oh no her brother is that sheriff ain't he?" Murdock put in.

"Yes, he is Sugar." confirmed Daisy.

"Ok so everything is a big tangled mess. What else is new. What are we gonna do about it?" BA summarized.

Different ideas and tactics were suggested and tossed around. At long last it was decided that they needed to know where the actual computers were because empty crates were useless as evidence or leverage. A plan was hatched up to snoop a bit in Boss's office at the Boar's Nest. Then Murdock remembered about Boss Hogg ranting about his important phone call while he and Bo were in the jailhouse. The snooping plan expanded to include the telephone operators office as well. Bo and Face would take on the operator while Murdock and Luke searched Boss's with Daisy as lookout.

( _The next day, about mid morning)_

Bo and Face strolled into the Telephone Operator Offices, both wearing their own charming and disarming smiles. They were greeted by a blue-eyed blond with her own sweet southern smile. She cast an appraising and appreciative glance over both men.

"Well, Bo Duke, I know you but who is this here city boy with you?" she drawled as she removed her operator's headset.

Face bashfully adjusted his tie while Bo answered, "This is Templeton. He's distant relation from the west coast _."_

"So why are you both here this morning?"she asked

Looking awkward and abashed, Face responded, "Well its a somewhat embarrassing situation, Miss..."

"Maybelle, Miss Maybelle Tillingham."

"Ah Miss Maybelle, well you see I need to contact a business associate back in Hollywood but I've lost my address book. I was hoping you'd be able to assist me with that."

"Well that's easy, just give me his or her full name and I'll bring it up."

"Well that's also part of the problem. I have quite forgotten his last name." Face threw in a dramatic pause and head drop as he said this. "But you see, Lance, that's my associate, did telephone me at the Duke Farm. I was hoping you'd be able to run a trace on that call to retrieve the phone number for me."

Always intrigued by a chance to snoop into someone else's business Maybelle jumped at this opportunity. She certainly wanted to know what ties the Dukes had to Hollywood. After a moments thought she knew how to help the two attractive men in front of her.

"You are in luck, Templeton, Boss Hogg recently updated our office so we have a new fangled computer. I can use that to trace your call. I just need the date and time."

Face provided that information, based on the times that Bo and Murdock were in the sheriff's office. Just as the screen was about to load Face nudged Bo. The blond Duke Boy lazily draped himself across the top of the monitor. Making sure to capture Maybelle with an intense gaze.

"Hey, um, Maybelle...could I ask you something Darlin'?"

"What is it Bo?"

"Well not here ... maybe over there...a bit more private and all."

"Well ok. I guess but my computer...the information."

"Oh no worries Miss Maybelle. I will be able to recognize my kin's phone number when it comes up. Go ahead and go talk to Bo." Face encouraged.

"Well ok. But don't you go touching anything, Ya hear."

Bo lead Maybelle off to the furthest corner and kept her back to the computer desk. Face watched long enough to see that Bo had captured her full attention then he began to scan for the information he was really after. Within two minutes he had it name, number, and address. He quickly jotted it all down in his trusty pocket notebook and tapped the escape key. A gentle cough alerted Bo to his success.

"Ok then Maybelle I'll see you next Saturday." Bo assured her and then turned to Face and asked, "All set there cousin?"

"Yes I am Bo. Although I do have to apologize, Maybelle, quite out of habit I cleared the screen. This model is so like the computer I have in my Hollywood office. It was just an automatic thing to clear it and return back to the home screen."

With a disappointed pout at being denied her snoop, Maybelle distractedly responded, "Oh that's ok Templeton. I'll see you Saturday Bo. I'll be in my new sundress."

The two heartthrobs left the building and headed back to Jesse's truck. Face teasingly asked, "So what did you have to promise her to keep her distracted?"

"I started out by vaguely asking her for a date. But by the end of it i somehow agreed to be her date at her best friend's sister's wedding next Saturday."

"Oh boy. That's taking one for the team. Thanks Bo."

"Worst part is I used to go out with the bride-to-be back when we were in high school."

Both men cringed and laughed..

(Meanwhile over at the Boar's Nest)

Luke and Murdock were lurking in the bushes near the rear door of Boar's Nest. As soon as Daisy opened it from inside the two shot into Boss's office. Murdock couldn't help himself and immediately took a spin in Boss's barber chair.

Daisy slipped back out to the front room promising to alert them if Boss or Rosco pulled in.

The two men set to searching for clues. Luke went to Boss's roll top desk and Murdock took the file cabinet.

"I wonder if we will actually find anything here. Seems foolish to keep a paper trail on illegal activities." pondered Luke.

"The Colonel always says that everyone keeps records even ones they don't want found." declared Murdock as he flipped through the files.

"Well lookie here!" whistled Luke. Murdock came to look over his shoulder. "Insurance checks covering the three robbed stores." Luke explained. Murdock quickly snapped photos using the Team's sneaky camera while Luke dug deeper into the desk drawer. He found an inventory list with distribution information. Murdock photographed that as well.

Suddenly Daisy's voice rang out, "Hey there, BOSS! What brings you in so early?"

Both men jumped to alert. Just in time to hear keys in jingling in the back door. Desperately they dove into the closet near the exit. They heard Boss coming in from the bar Daisy was trying to stall him by offering to serve him a beer. "You can bring one in here Daisy. I've got to let that dipstick Rosco in. I can hear him struggling with the back door. Fool can't even find the right key on a ring, how I can expect him to find criminals is beyond me."

Daisy cast a nervous glance about the room. She spotted a bit of blue caught in the jam of the closet door, clearly Luke's denim shirt. She rushed past Boss to get the exit door. She let Rosco in then stood in front of the tell tale fabric. She greeted the sheriff sweetly.

"Well hello there, Rosco. Sure is hot out there today, ain't it?'

"Hi there Daisy. Yeah it is..." Rosco cut his response short because as he went to tip his hat to Daisy he realized he didn't have it.

"Missing your hat, Rosco?" Daisy asked, the picture of Georgian innocence.

"That Dipstick would lose his skull if it wasn't held on by his spine. Lord knows his brains have already leaked out." growled Boss

"You both look overheated. The bartender just tapped into a fresh keg. Why don't y'all come enjoy an icy mug." invited Daisy, "and Boss the receipts are all set for your review too."

Rosco looked at her then Boss hopefully. After a moment's hesitation Boss nodded his approval. The three paraded out to the front room with Boss mumbling that Rosco was going to pay for the beers they were about to drink because he lost his uniform hat.

"But BOSS, my hat ain't lost. I told you I know where it is. I left it at Millers Creek when I was checking on the ..."

Boss interrupted with a blood thinning glare and ordered, "Stifle your flapping jaws. I don't care...you're still paying for the beer."

As soon as Daisy soundly shut the office door. Luke and Murdock shot out of the closet and the exit door. They ran to the General Lee which they had hidden behind the bar's supply shed.

 **Additional Author's Notes/Copyright Disclosures:**

Maybelle Tillingham (aka- Myrtle Tillingham) played by Lindsey Bloom appeared in several episodes of The Dukes of Hazzard between 1979-1981

"...everyone keeps records ..." is a line Hannibal says to Face in the episode "In Plane Sight" Season 2 Episode 14


	5. 5 Repairs, Revelations, & Repercussions

**5**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Chapter Summary: The A-Team and Dukes gather some alarming information..

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 5: Repairs, Recon, & Repercussions **

The four Agents of Snoop pulled into the Duke driveway at the same exact time. They all went straight to the barn because BA, Hannibal, and Uncle Jesse were all in there. BA was elbow deep in repairs to the van. Hannibal was polishing the newly installed replacement headlight. Uncle Jesse was feeding the plow horse.

"Hey great news Big Guy, you should have the rest of your parts by suppertime." Murdock announced.

"And how would you know that Captain? We were expecting them tomorrow at the earliest." inquired Hannibal.

"We ran to Cooter's after our visit to the Boars Nest because we needed gasoline. He spoke with a supplier in Atlanta who had your tie rods in stock so he was driving down after lunch to get them. He's gonna get our film developed in the city too." explained Luke.

"Film?" asked Jesse.

Murdock revealed what they'd seen and photographed in Boss's office. Then Face reported on the success of their fact and name finding mission.

"Do any of you know that Colt Twiggs feller that was on the phone with Boss Hogg?" Hannibal asked. All the Duke men said no

"I'm glad Cooter is bringing the parts here so soon. We need my van pronto. I'll work all night to get it ready. If this Miss Lulu lady is as nice as you all say I don't want her husband bringing her no trouble." declared BA.

Daisy came home for her lunch break. She was pulling a double shift at the Nest today. As the group chowed down they brought her up to speed.

"Hey Colt Twiggs? Yeah I know that guy. He's new in town. He's been winning at the pool tables and running up quite the tab at the Nest. I expected Boss to get angrier than a wet hen when he saw the receipts today. But ya know he didn't even cluck."

"Oh now we know for sure he's in cahoots with JD. Only his greed over a fast deal would overpower his primal need for profit." said Luke.

"Y'all should come to the Boars Nest tonight. I'm sure Colt will come in. He ain't missed a night in three weeks. That way you could get to see him and maybe get some information," suggested Daisy. She gave a quick description of their target and commented that he drives a beat down green Chevy pickup.

Everyone agreed that Daisy had a good point. Hannibal said he could see a plan coming together. Thus seven o'clock found Hannibal and Bo mingling and drinking beer in the Boar's Nest. Face was sitting at a table near the back wall that offered a clear view of the entrance. Daisy was hopping; busy tending to and serving all the tables in the place. Harry the bar tender was whipping out the foamy mugs as fast as she could deliver them.

About 7:30 the door squawked open and a dark haired, buzzed cut, six footer strutted in. Daisy swung past his table, set a beer in front of Face and whispered, "That's Colt Twiggs."

The focus of their attention ordered a brew at the counter then strolled over to the pool tables with his mug. Hannibal was just dispatching a defeated opponent and pocketing his winnings.

Faceman's glance confirmed Twiggs' identity with the Colonel.

"Hey there stranger, looks like I'm in need of a competitor. Can I interest you in a friendly game?" Hannibal invited in a light southern drawl.

"How friendly?" challenged Twiggs.

"Set your limits." offered Hannibal.

"Twenty bucks a game. Eightball." said Twiggs.

"Agreed. Shall my buddy there hold our wagers?" Hannibal replied, indicating Bo with a nudge his shoulder. Twiggs found this acceptable and Bo set up the table.

As Hannibal set up his break shot he asked, "We calling groups on the break or first shot afterwards?'

"I ain't fancy, call it on the break."

Having sunk two solids, Hannibal called that group. The game played out smoothly both competitors vying for control of the table. The game fell to Twiggs at which point Hannibal lobbied for a chance to "even things up". Twiggs agreed but at a double or nothing wager. Again Bo held the money.

They racked them up and Hannibal broke,sinking two stripes in the process. Subsequently he missed on his next turn so Twiggs lined up his shot. Just as he slid his cue forward Face drunkenly stumbled into him. This caused Twiggs to scratch, instantly losing. He cursed loudly then slung a harsh left hook into Face's chin. Face tumbled into the poker game on a nearby table. Those men angrily charged Twiggs. Hannibal leapt to his defense. A few shoves ensued but Daisy came flying over carrying a sweet soothing smile and a tray full of free beers.

"Now, now, Boys. Y'all settle down and enjoy these freebies. No real harm done. Daryl you know dang well you hadn't even dealt the first hand yet. And I'm sure this handsome gentleman will let you replay your shot, Mr. Twiggs."

Distracted by her flirtations the men all settled down and agreed to her ideas. She lead Face off to the kitchen to get an ice pack. Twiggs joined Bo and Hannibal at their table when Hannibal agreed to concede the match to Twiggs at the original wager.

Once in the kitchen Face removed Twiggs' wallet from his boot. He'd snatched it when he tumbled into the bum.

"Anything good in there, Face? Is it worth the shiner you're gonna have tomorrow?" asked Daisy as she applied the ice to Faceman's already bruising cheek.

"Well the address on Twiggs' license matches the one I scrounged from the telephone records. Its local, one town over. There is also a business card for one JD Hogg in here, and a key with a tag for the Moonshine Motel." answered Face.

"Well that's for sure ties him to Boss and that motel is a "we ask no questions"dump just outside of town. I wonder why he needs a room there with his house so nearby?" pondered Daisy "How ya gonna get that wallet back to him without looking suspicious?"

"Oh I'll think of something while you're so sweetly tending to my injury, sustained in the line of duty." Face drawled, mischief dancing in his eyes.

"Ok, Sugar, but that only gives you about a minute, cuz I've gotta get back to work out there."

That's all the time Face needed to work out an innocent looking scheme. Well actually spotting Luke and Murdock approaching the bar stools after concluding their dart game inspired him. Face shared his plan with Daisy and they set forth.

She intercepted Luke and Murdock then led them over to the table near the poker game, chatting quietly. Face walked past as the men began to sit and slid the wallet to Murdock. Once Daisy and Face were clear, Murdock dropped his fork onto the floor. He leaned down to retrieve it and exclaimed, "Hey what's this?"

People looked over to see the newcomer sitting up with a wallet in his hand. He curiously opened it as he announced that he just found it on the floor. "Is there a Colton Twiggs here?!"

"Hey that's me! Whatcha doing with my wallet?"

"Look Buddy, I just found it on the floor here when I picked up my fork. Here take it back man. I sure don't want it." Murdock replied defensively as he tossed it to Twiggs.

The thug quickly checked its contents and found nothing missing. He began to shove it into his back pocket.

"Hey while you've got it out here's the money I owe you, Pal. I bet it fell when you were in that scuffle earlier. This is your lucky day, winning at pool and getting your wallet back." Hannibal said as he inched a fresh brew toward Twiggs.

Faceman stayed perched at the bar for the rest of the evening. Hannibal kept Twiggs engaged in seemingly idle chatter for about another twenty minutes, until his mark suddenly left. It surprised no one that at that exact moment JD strode through the bar and went directly to his office.

Quickly, yet separately, the Duke Boys and the Team, left the Boars Nest. Once in the lot they were greeted by the sweet sight of BA's van parked off to the side. The five men hustled over to it and squeezed in.

"Great job, Sergeant! You've got her back on the road." praised Hannibal as he swung into his usual seat. Face and Luke perched in the back seats while Murdock and Bo took spots on the floor.

"Of course I've got my van fixed Hannibal. Cooter came by just after you left and we got to work. 'Bout time you suckas came out of that bar. I've been out here for an hour, watching the place."

"You have BA? Why didn't you come inside Big Guy?" chirped Murdock.

"Shut up Fool. You know how I feel about barrooms. Besides I pulled in just as Twiggs did. So I held back and stuck a tracker on his ride. And right after some stout fella in a white suit and white convertible arrived, Twiggs shot out of the bar and went 'round to the back door. He's still in there."

"Well done BA. This plan is coming together nicely." hummed Hannibal.

"Boy, I'd love to know what Boss and that Twiggs are talking about." Bo stated.

"Face?" summoned Hannibal as he brandished his cigar and cocked a daring eyebrow.

"All set, Colonel. I planted the transmitter when I bumped into him." replied Face

"You sure do have some fast hands. Remind me never to turn my back on you." teased Bo.

Meanwhile Murdock had pulled a receiver out from his inner jacket pocket and turned it on. After a brief moment of static Boss Hoggs's voice boomed out of the radio.

"Well Twiggs lets not forget that YOU work for ME. You don't call the shots, I do." blustered Boss

Twiggs laughed coldly, "Look you over inflated volleyball. I take all the risks. I know where the computers are. You've got nothing without me. I want 70% of the sale money and 50% of the insurance money."

"Ha! You've got to be kidding, we already made a deal. You get 50/30. That's what you agreed to. If you don't like that I can have my sheriff arrest you for grand theft. " argued Boss.

"Listen Chubby. That's not gonna happen either. Now since you're being so selfish I just changed my offer again. I get 100% of the computer sales and 100% of the insurance. Or else!"

"Or else what?!" snarled Boss.

"Or else my associate drops your whining wife off the Peabody Dam and sees if she can swim while hog tied!"

Boss gasped. "What do you mean? How dare you threaten my wife!"

"Listen, Hogg, we've already got her. Snatched her after her quilting bee. If I don't show up by tomorrow night with all the money in my hands, your missus is feeding the trouts."

"I don't believe you. I'm calling Lulu right now."

"Don't bother. Here's a Polaroid for proof."

"Oh my GOD! Fine fine, I'll get your money, just don't hurt my Lulu."

"You've got until 5pm tomorrow. Not a second longer. You know how to contact me."

Then they heard Twiggs storm out the back door. They watched him swagger over to his truck and speed off.

"Oh no. We've got to help Miss Lulu." declared Bo and Luke.

"We are gonna do just that." agreed Hannibal


	6. Chapter 6 Mounting a Rescue

**6**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

 **Hello** **Sorry for such a drought between updates unfortunately writing has clearly been on a back burner. But rest assured i have not abandoned the A-team in Hazzard County For those of you just finding this story, Welcome. For those of you returning, Thank- you for your loyalty and continued interest.**

Chapter Summary: Everyone unites to save Lulu.

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 6: Mounting a Rescue**

"Where do you think they have Miss Lulu?" fretted Bo.

Face explained about Twiggs carrying the motel key in spite of his local address. The men decided that both locations were viable options. As they were talking, Rosco sped up to the Nest in his patrol car. He parked it and rushed into Boss"s Office.

"We should be high tailing it after Twiggs." declared Bo.

"Not to worry, man. My tracker is sending a clear signal. We can tail him from an invisible distance." explained BA.

BA waited about five minutes then began to pursue the thug. The Duke Boys had switched over to the General Lee and were following the A-team. Jesse soon joined the Calvary line because Luke had radioed from their car. After about 15 minutes BA pulled off into a riverbank clearing.

All the men gathered at the van's open slider.

"Why have we stopped here, Hannibal?" asked Jesse.

"The tracker has indicated that Twiggs has stopped moving. He's up about a half mile north from here. Any ideas about what we might be riding into?" Hannibal responded.

"Well he didn't go to his house or to the Moonshine Motel. Both are plum in the opposite direction." Luke said.

"The only thing around here is Old Man Wilkins' run down fishing shack. He ain't used that in years, not since his stroke." added Bo.

"Is it solid enough to hide a kidnap victim in? It certainly seems isolated and forgotten enough." asked Face.

"It sure could be." Jesse confirmed thoughtfully. "Nobody is likely to be looking at it."

"Well, Men. You know what we've got to do." declared Hannibal.

His men uttered a chorus of groans. BA shook his head. Face began to open the ordinance locker. Murdock twisted his cap and plopped onto the van's floor.

"Hannibal. Don't tell me that you think a full frontal half pincer into an un-reconned target is our best option here. And its dark, to boot!" complained Murdock.

"No worries, Captain. We will do a recon but we're going in armed and ready." explained a jazzing-up Hannibal. Murdock dropped his head resignedly.

When Jesse saw Face and BA readying the automatic weapons he became alarmed. "Now now, Hannibal. I already told you that my Boys are on probation and can't be seen around nor using no guns."

The Team stopped short. All eyes were now on the Colonel. He was chewing on his cigar, in full planning mode.

"Ok. We have several objectives before us. Rescue Lulu Hogg, recover the stolen computers, and make sure that Twiggs and his partner pay for their poor choices. Our best chance at accomplishing all this is to divide our resources. That should keep Bo and Luke well away from fraternizing with our arsenal. Does that sound good, Jesse?"

Jesse nodded his approval. The men huddled up to formulate an action plan. Meanwhile Luke and Murdock snuck up to the fishing shack to confirm that Lulu was in fact being held there and to assess the threat levels. They were back in ten minutes. Just as they returned BA announced that Twiggs' car was on the move again.

The plan went into motion. The A-team would mount the rescue of Lulu. Bo and Luke would keep on Twiggs' tail using BA's tracker. Luke understood how to interpret it thanks to his own military experience. Jesse would head on back to Boss and figure out a way to let him know that Lulu was being rescued without revealing too much info about the A-team. After all Decker had chased them off their last case so it was logical to assume that he was still somewhere in the area. Therefore the fewer people who knew about the Team the safer it was for them. Everyone set off to complete their part of the mission.

—AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—

"Ok Captain what sort of rat's nest are we walking into?" asked Hannibal.

"A standard shack, not even a cabin. One door in the front. One full window on the west side and a small high transom over the door. Path to the door is fairly clear but the brush has grown up nice and tight up to the sides of the shack. Luke snuck up and confirmed that Ms Hogg was bound to a kitchen chair and shoved up against the far west corner. She won't be able to see out the window. The bad guy was perched on a couch on the opposite wall. He might be able to spot us through the window. If he's alert. Clearly he missed Luke."

"Any separate rooms or closets, Captain?"

"Negative, Colonel. There is an outhouse about 20 yards off the east side of the shack."

"Weapons?" Hannibal asked

"We were unable to ascertain that."

—AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—

"This tracker is a fine piece of equipment. Take a left at Peach Tree Road." said Luke.

Bo followed his directions, kicking up a spray of gravel

"Easy Cousin, we don't have to get up his tail pipe."

"I'm guessing Twiggs is heading to the Moonshine Motel. Why else would he be heading this way?" Bo commented.

Sure enough six miles and two more left turns later the Duke Boys drove past the no-tell motel just in time to see Twiggs pulling up to the last room on the far end of the building. They nonchalantly cruised by but pulled a u-turn once out of sight of the establishment. They parked behind the ancient gas station across the street from the motel. They were able to watch Twiggs moving around inside, he seemed to be arranging large shipping boxes.

"Looks like we've located the hot computers." announced Luke.

—AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—

Jesse pulled up to the Boars Nest and parked behind Rosco's patrol car, deliberately pinning the Sheriff in his spot. Rosco, was standing next to his car arguing with Enos over the CB radio. Jesse stepped out of his pickup just in time to hear Coltrane say,

"Listen, you Dipstick, just get yourself and Cletus over here pronto. I don't care if that leaves the jail unmanned. Old drunken Clive Cooney ain't gonna do no harm. So ya hear me?! Git here NOW!"

He threw his mike into his car and faced Jesse.

"Jesse Duke, you gotta move that old pick up. I've got police business to attend to and you're interfering.'

"I know all about that Rosco. That's why I'm here. I've got to talk to you and Boss."

"Now, Jesse, how do you have any idea what I'm doing! I've got an emergency to deal with. Now move that truck or I'll ... I'll ...have it impounded. Yeah that's what I'll do."

"Rosco, I know you're upset. But I've got to talk to you and Boss. I know where LuLu is and I know she's going to be just fine."

Both men turned as Boss Hogg suddenly bellowed from the office exit door, "Just how do you know something about anything about my Lulu, Jesse Duke?"

Uncle Jesse strutted over to Boss and both men went back into the office. Rosco could do nothing but follow. Once inside Jesse began to explain, as well as he could, what was going on,

"Look J.D. we followed Twiggs to Miss Lulu. She's ok and is being rescued right now."

"Jesse why were you following this Twiggs person? How is LuLu being rescued? AND, who is we?" snapped Boss.


	7. Chapter 7 Hannibal LIWAPCT

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Chapter Summary: The plan comes together...sort of...

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 7: Hannibal LIWAPCT**

"LOOK, JD, Lulu is being held captive in Jeb Wilkins' fishing shack. Some friends of mine are rescuing her right now." Jesse replied.

"Is she all right, Jesse? They haven't hurt my sister have they?" asked Rosco sincerely.

"Near as we could tell she is just fine." Jesse answered while patting Rosco's shoulder.

"That's all well and good Jesse but how did you, and your so called friends, get involved in any of this?" challenged Boss.

Jesse went on to spin a tale that Twiggs tried to sneak out on paying his pool wager to Bo so the boys followed him when he left. That lead them to Lulu. Jesse revealed that Bo and Luke kept tailing Twiggs when he left the shack but their friends stayed to rescue Lulu. Jesse ended his semi truthful yet vague yarn saying, "and I came here to let you know what was happening."

Before Boss could respond Daisy shot into the office. "Uncle Jesse, Luke is on the bar phone saying he needs to talk to you. He sounds worried."

Everyone tumbled over to the phone. Jesse picked up the dangling receiver,

"What is it Luke?"

—AAAAAAAAAAAA—

The A-team stealthily approached the shabby shack. They could hear frustrated voices coming from within.

"Ah Lady will you just be quiet now! I'm sick of hearing you whine."

"I just need to use the privy. Not even a scoundrel like you can be so low as to not allow a lady to see to basic needs."

"I told you, you're gonna wait til my partner gets back."

"I need to go now" Lulu pleaded, then scornfully added, "Partner my foot! He's your boss and you're his lackey."

"I am not! We is equal partners!" shouted the perturbed male.

"Equal partners, not in this life. You can't even make the decision to bring a helpless woman to the privy, without Twiggs' permission." Lulu taunted.

The Team all glanced at each other. "The lady has spunk." commented Murdock

"I hope that spunk doesn't get her hurt. Then I'll have to double squash that sucka!" grumbled BA

'Fine! Just FINE. I'll take you to the outhouse just slam your jaw shut! And remember I've got this here gun. And I ain't afraid to use it." griped the kidnapper.

Seeing their prime lucky opportunity, Hannibal dispatched Face and Murdock to flank the outhouse. He and BA would lurk near the shack entrance to surround the thug and Lulu. Once she was safely in the outhouse, away from the lowlife, they would drop the hammer on him.

—AAAAAAAAAA—

"Uncle Jesse, Twiggs has left the Moonshine Motel. By what the tracker tells me he's headed back to the shack. I can't raise Hannibal and the guys in the CB. They won't know he's coming." Luke urgently announced.

'That's all right Luke. I'll head back there right now with Rosco. You meet us there."

"Uncle Jesse thats the trouble. We've got a flat tire. Bo must have picked up a nail from the parking lot. We're stuck here til Bo finishes swapping tires. Oh and near as we can tell all the computers are here in the motel.'

"That's alright, son. We will go catch Twiggs right now. And that's good information about those items. See you at the shack."

Jesse hung up. He and Daisy ran for his truck and Boss with Rosco in tow crammed into the patrol car. All four set off for the fishing shack.

—AAAAAAAAAA—

As soon as the Team had taken up their positions, the door of the shack creaked open. The escaping light revealed the accomplice shoving a wobbly Lulu Hogg out onto the step and awkwardly forcing her to the outhouse. He kept poking Lulu's back with the barrel of his rifle. On the count of five, after she shut the door, the Team surged forward, guns blazing.

The startled thug whirled around trying to see all four adversaries at once. He managed a frantically aimed shot that cleared Murdock by a country mile. This gave BA the open space to slug him right in his scrawny jaw. The Big Guy quickly followed that blow with two more cannon like punches to his rib cage. The guy was down. Hannibal claimed the rifle and jammed his foot against the scumbag's windpipe.

"We don't like lowlifes who terrorize innocent women. If you've got any intelligence at all, you'll stay frozen where you lay."

Meanwhile Lulu had burst out of the outhouse. Face had swiftly grasped her hand and lead her away from the fray. Murdock provided them cover.

Once the dust settled she shakily asked, "Who are you guys? What's happening?"

"We are just some concerned citizens, Mrs. Hogg, and you've just been rescued." replied Hannibal."Now once we get this creep tied up, we will lead you back to our van and take you home."

Before Hannibal had finished speaking Murdock was binding the thugs hands behind his back then for double security, Murdock lashed his arms to his body.

"You fellas are gonna regret this! My partner...he's gonna get you for interfering in things that ain't your business."

"Don't be counting on that Pip. Your boss won't give too wags about a nameless lackey like you." taunted Hannibal.

"Hey! I've got a name! It's Donnie Floyd." replied the petulant weasel.

"Ah Pip, it doesn't really matter. Not where you're going, under a kidnapping conviction." snarled Hannibal.

The six people began to make their way back to the van. Murdock took point. Face lead Lulu. BA had custody of the prisoner and Hannibal was at rear guard.

"How'd you all find me and know who I am?" Lulu asked Face.

"We've become friends with the Duke family, ma'am, they told us your name. And we figured out that Twiggs had kidnapped you so we followed him here."

"I don't understand what he wanted with me. Maybe he just figured to collect a ransom from my JD. But my brother, Rosco, he's the sheriff and he's gonna make Twiggs and this Donnie Floyd pay for what they've done." Lulu rambled, mainly to calm herself.

"You can work that all out just as soon as we get you home, Mrs. Hogg." Face responded soothingly.

Their hike back to the van was going smoothly until they were almost to the riverbank. That's when Murdock signaled a full halt. No one liked what they saw in the clearing. There were three vehicles with their van. Jesse's truck, a patrol car, and Twiggs' puck-up. Rosco was laying on the ground, unconscious. Jesse and Boss were lined up against the cop car with their hands in the air. Most disturbing of all, Daisy was being held hostage by Twiggs. He had his arm wrapped around her neck and a gun to her head.


	8. Chapter 8 Dealing with a Bad Situation

**8**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Chapter Summary: The Dukes help resolve a bad situation.

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 8: Dealing with a Bad Situation.**

"Oh no! That miserable Twiggs feller is hurting Daisy!" cried Lulu as they watched Twiggs dragging the Duke girl towards his truck.

"What's the plan, Hannibal?" demanded BA.

Hannibal thought for a minute. He told BA to secure Donnie Floyd to a nearby oak tree. Then he instructed LuLu to take cover in a stand of pines and to not come out until everything was settled. He and the Team checked their weapons and began a quick yet stealthy approach to the target site. Face and BA took left, he and Murdock the right. When they were about a hundred feet out, keeping to the tree line, they suddenly heard a cacophonous round of "Dixie" and a roaring engine.

With a cloud of dust the General Lee invaded the scene. Luke was perched on the passenger door brandishing a compound bow. He unleashed an arrow at Twiggs which dislodged his hat. These distractions gave Daisy the opportunity to grind her red high heel into the arch of his foot. Now predictably off balance, he loosened his grip on her. She managed to shove off his chest, break free, and run to Uncle Jesse.

Twiggs regained his footing and lunged into his pick up. While Bo banged a u-turn Twiggs squealed off. Luke fired off a couple more shots but each time the arrows lamely bounced off the tires. Bo slammed the brakes and the Boys shimmied out of the General. They rushed over to their family.

Everyone was alright. Daisy, already recovered from her struggle, was ministering to Rosco. The bruised lawman was regaining consciousness. Just as Rosco came to (pointlessly drawing his pistol) Hannibal and Face appeared with Lulu. She ran to Boss Hogg. The couple embraced, until Boss became embarrassed by his atypical public display of affection. Two beats behind was BA with a distraught Donnie Floyd.

"Who are you three?" asked a flustered Rosco.

"I'm Hannibal, these are my teammates, BA and Face."

"Oh JD, these fine fellers rescued me from that horrid Twiggs and his flunkey." explained Lulu.

"These are my friends that I told you about, JD." added Jesse.

Boss shot the A-Team a grateful yet suspicious look, carefully sizing them up. Hannibal was doing the same to the stout white clad man in front of him.

"Seems I owe you a debt of gratitude." conceded Boss.

"Yeah, um thank you for helping my sister." said Rosco, then he mumbled under his breath, "but I would have done that just as soon as I got here."

BA handed Donnie Floyd over to the Sheriff. He was glad to be rid of the no good kidnapping fool. Rosco grabbed the bound prisoner and redundantly cuffed him. Then the lawman stuffed Donnie into his squad car.

"But hey ya'all? Twiggs has gotten away. He's gonna hightail it outta here I bet " said Daisy.

At this Luke let out an ironic chuckle and said, "He may have gotten away for now, Daisy, but I doubt he's going very far."

"Why do you think that, Luke?' asked Jesse.

Bo chuckled this time, "Because while I was changing our flat tire Luke got busy moving Twiggs boxes out of that motel room. He's not gonna want to walk away empty handed, not after all this trouble."

Boss and Rosco gasped at this revelation. Rosco was about to ask about the computers until, the always conniving, Boss poked him in the ribs. Feigning innocence Boss inquired about the meaning of Bo's statement. Now it was the Dukes' turn to play cagey. Luke did admit to relocating Twiggs' stash of "some sort of electronics equipment" into the ruins of the abandoned garage across from the Moonshine Motel.

Just then Lulu gave into her fright and fatigue, she insisted that she be brought home immediately. Daisy and Jesse offered to drive her home in their truck. Rosco would take the cuffed and stuffed Donnie Floyd to the jailhouse. Boss would ride along.

Bo, Luke, and the A-Team were left behind at the river bank. As soon as the patrol car was out of sight Murdock strolled up carrying their weapons.

"I was wonderin' where you were at." Luke greeted him.

"Just honoring the Colonel's promise to keep you guys separated from our guns." replied Murdock as he and BA stowed the arms.

"So what are we going to do now, Hannibal? I'm sure none of us have any inclination to let Twiggs get away with his crimes." prodded Face as he passed a fresh cigar to his commander.

Hannibal accepted his cheroot, lit it, grinned maniacally, and replied, "Of course not, Lieutenant. We're going to rework Twiggs' circuit boards."

"Boss Hogg might have his own opinions about that, Hannibal," Luke felt compelled to point out.

 ** _Additional Authors note:_**

For the record "cuffed and stuffed' and assorted variations of it is a catch phrase of Rosco P. Coltrane and therefore falls under the realm of Gy Waldron and associates.


	9. Chapter 9 Setting Traps

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

 **So sorry for the massive delay between chapter updates. This summer has presented a plethora of surprises and situations that have required my focus and derailed my writing time. We are definitely in the home stretch now.**

Chapter Summary: Everyone is trying wrap up their troubles.

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 9: Setting Traps.**

Twenty minutes later all six heroes were crouched down in the undergrowth on the edges of the Moonshine Motel property. They were all enjoying the scene being played out in that mangy corner room.

Twiggs had been on a rampage, furious and beyond functional, since discovering that every single computer was gone. He'd already searched the vacant room to the left and stormed into the room across the lot He searched that one despite the screams of the scantily clad damsel and her sputtering date. Luke had commented that the man was in less danger from Twiggs than if it had been his wife storming through that door. Twiggs then barreled into the motel office seeking answers. The greasy office manager of course had none but, with the help of his authentic Louisville Slugger, did manage to convince Twiggs to quietly return to his assigned room. Twiggs was now dialing his phone.

'Sure would be nice to know who he's calling." stated Hannibal.

"Already on it Colonel." Face quietly droned as he slipped off toward the buildings.

The others watched as he darted across the narrow gravel spit separating the building from the kudzu and saplings. Face pushed his back up against the windowless wall and crept up to the front door. He then squatted under the small, conveniently open, window and settled in to listen.

Twiggs was all but hissing into the phone.

"You best tell me where those computers are at Fat Man! Just because some yahoos got lucky and rescued your whining wife doesn't mean you or she are safe from me. Donnie Floyd is a coward and a moron. I'm not" ...

"Don't you play innocent with me Hogg! I saw you there when those Duke Boys chased me off. I know you were in on this double cross. I want those computers! I ain't walking away after all this trouble empty handed!" ...

"Ha! Turn me into the Feds. The hell you will! You can't send me up the river without going along with me. I'll sing like a prized canary." ...

"Yeah yeah. That's better. Be here in twenty minutes Or Else!" Twiggs concluded his conversation by slamming down the receiver and throwing the phone onto the bed. He then plopped down next to it.

Face hustled back to his Team and the Duke Boys.

"Well he was on the phone with Hogg, demanding the computers back. After threatening harm to Miss LuLu and Hogg, the two agreed to meet here. Boss Hogg should be here in twenty minutes."

"Ok that means JD will be at the computers in fifteen minutes." declared Luke.

Grinning, Hannibal said, "Ok then. That gives us ten minutes to work with...piece of cake."

Bo and Luke weren't quite sure why the other three men groaned miserably.

"Damn it Hannibal, don't be getting on the Jazz, man!" grumbled BA.

-AAAAAA-

Boss Hogg hung up the phone and glared at Rosco. The discombobulated sheriff had just returned from locking Donnie Floyd in one of the deep cells. He had ordered Enos to keep a close eye on the scoundrel.

"Twiggs assumes I know where the computers are and he expects me to return them to him or else." Boss spat out.

"Well Boss you do know where they are. The Dukes done told you." babbled Rosco.

"You and I know that. But Twiggs doesn't know that for sure. I might still be able to come out of all this ahead. I can find a new fence for those computers."

"But Boss? Whatcha gonna do about Twiggs? He knows where you and Lulu live and everything."

'Well if I didn't have my jackass brother-in-law as my sheriff I would be able to turn to my lawmen to take care of this problem for me. But... since I do...I'll have to think of something else myself.'

"Now, now, Boss that ain't exactly fair. Now is it? Even with a different lawman. Twiggs could still squeal on you to the State District Attorneys and what not." Rosco pointed out in a rare rush of common sense.

"Oh shut up Rosco. I've got to think." mumbled Boss as he sank into a chair.

-AAAAAAA-

Bo, Face, BA, and Hannibal hot footed it over to the abandoned garage and got to work.

A few minutes behind them, Luke and Murdock tumbled into the dusty building.

"All set, Captain?' asked Hannibal.

"Roger Dodger." replied Murdock.

All the men continued to remove the computers from the boxes. They then replaced the machines with the assorted left over parts and equipment laying about. They hid the machines in the lift pit and lowered the lift to conceal them.

They then set up their booby trap and took their positions. The only thing left to do was wait.

Boss and Rosco showed up right on time. They did a quick counting of the boxes and, to everyone's relief, didn't inspect inside the crates.

"Good, good Luke wasn't lying when he said he put all the loot here," Boss gleefully schemed, "Now Rosco, put Donnie Floyd's hat and work gloves on the pile. We've got to make Twiggs believe it was that idgit who moved the boxes and that you forced him to confess where they were. That way Twiggs will believe that Donnie double crossed him and we will be off that hook."

"Good plan, good plan, my little fat buddy,' snickered Rosco, "but how are you gonna convince Twiggs to leave without these here computers?"

"I'm not gonna. I'm gonna let him leave with them ...that is until he hits Chickasaw County and Sheriff Little. You see Sheriff Little is gonna get a short anonymous phone call tip about a notorious computer thief driving through his county."

"He is? How's that gonna happen?"

"Because jackass I'm gonna call it in just as soon as Twiggs leaves here."

"But Boss, he's just gonna squeal all about your and my involvement when Little arrests him?" complained Rosco.

"So let him. He's got no evidence that we were in cahoots with him. Lulu will identify him as her kidnapper, why would we be allied with him. Besides which, the only fingerprints on these here boxes are his, Donnie Floyd's, and ...the Duke Boys. We're gonna solve a bunch of problems today." declared Boss.

 **Additional Notes:::::::::::::::::::::**

'Little fat buddy" is a catchphrase of Rosco P. Coltrane and thus Gy Waldron et. al.

Sheriff Little of Chickasaw County is an original character from the Dukes of Hazzard and thereby belongs to Gy Waldron and associates.

Sheriff Little was portrayed by Don Pedro Colley in ten appearances between 1981-84

On a side note Mr. Colley also appeared as Little John in the A-Team 2 part episode "Bend in the River"


	10. Chapter 10 Justice Hazzard Style

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

 **Hello, Thanks once again for your continued interest in this story. My updates have been slower coming than I typically prefer. It's been a very distracting Summer. But I've finally had the thrill of "writing opportunity" and "inspiration" striking at the same time and I capitalized it! So here they come, The Final Chapters. I hope you enjoy.**

Chapter Summary: The pieces are all fitting, or at least wedging into the correct places.

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 10: Justice...Hazzard Style.**

"Now, Colonel, Sir, I think our soup just got a bit cloudy." whispered Murdock.

"Well this does quicken the heart rate, doesn't it?" replied Hannibal.

Face and BA shared exasperated sneers as Face slouched up against the wall behind them.

Luke and Bo shrugged but didn't seem too worried. "So what are we gonna do now? Our scheme doesn't exactly jive with Boss's." inquired Luke.

"Ah but it will...with a few minor adjustments." declared Hannibal as he revealed his adapted plan.

Ten minutes later, between the spray of gravel he kicked up and the roar of his engine, there was no missing Twiggs' arrival. He stormed into the run down building and was greeted by Boss and Rosco. The Dukes and A-Team could see it all from their hideout in the storage loft.

"So Fat Man! Where are my computers!" demanded Twiggs.

"Now, now, don't be like that Twiggs. This snafu ain't our fault." wheedled Boss, "In fact, if it wasn't for our work, none of us would even know where the computers were."

"What are you trying to say you double talkin' weasel?"

"Just look over here. Look at those there computer boxes. You tell me what you see?" Boss replied smugly while gesturing toward the crates piled behind the dingy service counter.

Twiggs stomped over to the boxes. Incredulously he swiped up Donnie Floyd's hat and gloves. "I'll be damned. Maybe he's not as lily-livered as I gave him credit for."

Boss and Rosco dared to share conspiratorial smirks. Rosco had to stifle his signature chortle.

"After Rosco interrogated Donnie Floyd, Donnie finally confessed and told us where the machines were. He thinks the confession will get him out of taking the fall for kidnapping my sweet LuLu." explained Boss.

"But it won't! Now will it, Hogg?" Twiggs declared threateningly, while getting up into Boss's space.

"Oh no of course not. He's taking the fall for that. Don't you worry." promised Boss.

Rosco had tried to take shelter behind his little fat buddy, but the other two men weren't having that. Both insisted that he assist Twiggs in loading up the computer crates into Twiggs' truck bed. Within fifteen minutes Twiggs was tearing down the rural highway off toward Chickasaw County. As soon as he left Boss ran to his Cadillac, picked up the car phone, and put in his anonymous call to Sheriff Little.

He waddled back inside to find a very worried Rosco. The car lift was rising and exposing all the unboxed computers. Bo and Luke were strolling down from the storage loft, nonchalantly swiping dirt and dust off their jeans. (Murdock had pressed the trigger button while remaining hidden in the shadows.)

Boss and Rosco stood there sputtering and spitting trying to comprehend and respond to what was going on.

"Bo and Luke! What are you boys doing here?" Rosco finally managed to mumble.

"Oh I guess you could say we are just here protecting our good names." Luke replied.

"Yeah Boss, we came here to help you reclaim your stolen property. But then we heard you plotting to pin the robbery on us." said Bo

"And that was after we helped rescue Miss LuLu." added Luke in mock hurt tones.

Boss and Rosco simply stood there, mouths agape, utterly unable to defend themselves.

—AAAAAAAAAA—

Colt Twiggs swore menacingly when he saw the flashing lights of Sheriff Little's Chickasaw County police car in his rear view mirror. There was no way he was throwing in the towel at this point in the game so Twiggs slammed down on his accelerator and lurched off. Little was not a man who took kindly to people disrespecting his authority and therefore was now infuriated. His pursuit of this alleged criminal has just gotten personal. He radioed his dispatcher to provide an update on the situation.

Little was on Twiggs' tail faster than a trout on a night crawler. The pursuit was intense and dangerous. Twiggs barely navigated a tight sudden turn. As he was steering out of the skid his truck bed bounced off a road kissing oak. A loud boom sounded and the boxes in the bed burst into flames. In his frenzy to escape Twiggs drove for about another quarter mile before reacting to his predicament. He abruptly pulled over, bolted from his truck, and ran down an embankment aiming for a motorboat tied up at a primitive dock.

Little fired his gun. Dirt flew up into Twigg's face, kicked up by Little's too close bullets. That convinced the criminal to stop. He then complied with the sheriff's order to raise his hands and return to the road.

—AAAAAAAAAA—

"Well Boss, seems to me you've got a bit of a dilemma. Setting Sheriff Little after stolen computers that are right here with you." goaded Luke.

"What do you know about any of that?" blustered Boss.

"We heard it all." Bo confirmed.

"And more importantly we recorded it all." Hannibal's disembodied voice revealed. Then after a second of static, everyone heard Rosco and Boss' voices replaying everything they had said in the last half hour or so."

"So here's how this is gonna play out, Hogg." Hannibal continued from his hidden perch in the shadowy loft, "You're gonna get on the radio and tell that other sheriff that Rosco here is in pursuit of Twiggs for kidnapping your wife. Tell him that your police force also received an anonymous tip about his alleged computer thefts."

"But, but why would I wanna do ..."

"Because Hogg. If you don't follow my instructions I'm passing this recording onto Little and the Feds. The government doesn't like insurance frauds."

—AAAAAAAAAA—

As Little was slapping his cuffs onto Twiggs' wrists Rosco pulled up. The two lawmen eyed each other uneasily. Boss wiggled out of the patrol car.

"GOOD. GOOD! You've apprehended this here kidnapper. Well done, Little." said Boss.

"I'm not looking for any praise from you JD Hogg. And you Coltrane, this is my county you've got no jurisdiction here." hissed the stone cold sheriff.

"I ain't here looking for trouble. I just wanted to aid and assist in capturing this low life who kidnapped my dear sister." said Rosco.

Another small explosion caused everyone to look over at the inferno that had been Twiggs truck. Everything was incinerated. Suddenly, Rosco's radioed bubbled with Deputy Enos Straight's earnest excited voice.

Rosco grabbed his CB mike and instructed Enos to repeat himself.

"Sheriff! Me and Cletus are over at Clem's old abandoned service garage like you told us. And just like that anonymous caller said the car pit is full, just full of those computers."

The rage on Twiggs face made everyone appreciate that he was firmly cuffed. Little rammed him into his police car and slammed the door.

Now it was Deputy Cletus Hogg's voice on the airwaves. "Cousin Boss. You're gonna be so happy. These here computers. They're stamped with the names of the stores you own. You're gonna be getting your stolen property back."

Boss was barely able to hide his disgust and disappointment. Rosco saw it because he was feeling it too.

"What should we do with all this equipment now, Sheriff Rosco?" asked Enos.

Now it was Little's turn to speak. He snatched Rosco's mike and said, "You do what any knowledgeable lawman would do. You notify the FBI, leave the crime scene as it is, and stay there to ensure that it does."

"Hey hey hey! Those are my deputies. I'm the one who gives them their orders not, not you." complained Rosco while reclaiming his CB mike. He then whispered into it to tell Enos to do exactly what Little has said but to take his time doing it.


	11. Chapter 11:Jailing, Jiving, and Jigging

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor did I create, any of the A-team characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Stephen J. Cannell and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Cannell team.

Likewise, I do not own, nor did I create, any of the Dukes of Hazzard characters (main or support) nor do I own, nor did I create, any of the episodes. That credit is due to Gy Waldron and his associates. Any familiar catch phrases or settings also belong to the Waldron and team

Author's Notes: I came across a picture of a replica A-team van towing a replica General Lee and that started my brain thinking. What would happen if the A-team joined forces with the Duke Family to bring some justice onto a group of lowlife thugs?

Chapter Summary: The Heroes wrap things up.

 **Hijinks in Hazzard: by LAGC**

 **Chapter 11: Jailing, Jiving, and Jigging.**

Twenty-four hours later the Dukes and the A-Team once again gathered on the front porch of the farmhouse. Everyone was in a jovial mood while enjoying a lazy Saturday afternoon.

"I'm still not exactly sure why you Dukes let Boss Hogg slide completely off the hook." said Murdock. "With the video booby traps we had set up at the garage, we could have nailed him."

"Well truth be told I don't think we'd rightly know what to do 'round here if Boss wasn't in town.' said Daisy.

"Yeah, JD and I, well, we go back a long long ways. We know how far to let each other go. I guess you could say we naturally balance each other out." explained Jesse. "Plus having to return all the computers and refund all the money to his insurance company was the best punishment for him in the long run."

Hannibal nodded understandingly, but the rest of the Team didn't seem so sure.

"It probably helped that the FBI was a lot more interested in prosecuting the easily proven charge of kidnapping than they were in looking at the computer thefts." Face hypothesized.

"And since the insurance company and the stores recouped their losses, none of them were invested in pursuing criminal charges." said Murdock

"Well anyway. Twiggs is certainly going to pay for his part in all of this. And especially for terrorizing LuLu." added Luke, "That was some fancy work getting him on tape when he was blackmailing Boss and threatening to kill LuLu. I didn't realize your bugs were recorders too."

"BA is a genius with all things electronic and mechanical." praised Murdock while patting the Big Guy's shoulder. BA smiled shyly and gently pushed Murdock away.

"Funny how any self incriminating statements from Boss's mouth were all messed up with static." Bo interjected with a sly grin.

"Well that's how you guys wanted it." said Faceman. He had worked himself over to a cozy place next to Daisy during this conversation. "You are very forgiving and kind." he added while bestowing his trademark seductive smile on her.

Just then Daisy jumped up, nearly dislodging Face from his spot on the bench next to her.

"Oh my Goodness! I nearly forgot the time! I've got to get ready for my date with Enos. I can't go to the policeman ball in these here shorts, now can I."

Face glanced over those shorts with an expression that said he'd take her anywhere in them. But he knew when he was chasing the wrong target. Daisy ran into the house to prepare for her evening.

"Setting those charges in Twiggs' truck sure came in handy." Jesse said.

"Yes Murdock and Luke did a great job with that." complimented Hannibal. "The detonator was set to just the right amount of time."

"I hope that Twiggs doesn't cross paths with that Donnie Floyd fool in any prison yard. Twiggs is liable to take out all his frustrations on that Sucker." BA said. "Especially since he's dumb enough to believe Hogg's story that Donnie's the double crosser."

Everyone nodded while digesting BA's observation.

The men enjoyed a bit more conversation before Jesse went inside to prepare some sandwiches for them all. The Team was departing later that night and Jesse insisted they leave on full stomaches.

They were all eating their meal on the porch when Enos drove up in his personal car.

He strode over to them with a huge happy smile on his face. He was dressed to the nines in polished boots, slacks, dress shirt, Bolo tie, and vest. Everyone exchanged greetings.

"You're gonna cut a fine figure jigging and two stepping tonight, Enos." whistled Bo.

Jesse went inside to fetch Daisy. A few minutes later he escorted her out to her date. Every man there was spellbound. She had arraigned her hair into a darling updo with just a few curling tendrils lingering against her neck. Her golden dangling earrings drew attention to her face and shoulders. She was wearing a flirty sleeveless sunflower yellow frock with blue heels that accentuated her lovely dress and legs.

Poor Enos was dumbstruck.

"Well now, Enos, aren't you going to help me down these steps?" Daisy cooed.

"I sure...sure will, Daisy. You look beautiful...just beautiful." replied Enos as he gallantly took her arm to lead her down the steps. He then held the door of his car as she daintily took her seat. He shut the door then walked around to his side of the car.

He called goodbyes and then said, "I'm sure glad I left work when I did. Rosco was on the phone with some guy named Colonel Decker. They were talking about fingerprints on those stolen computers. I sure didn't want to get pulled into extra duty tonight so I hightailed it out the back door of the jailhouse. You' all have a great night."

"Oh no DECKER!" whined Face.

"Yep time to go. Now!" Hannibal said. BA immediately went to get the van from the barn.

'More of that unfinished business with the military?" asked Jesse

"Afraid so, Jesse. Sorry we have to run out like this." apologized Hannibal.

"Nothing to worry about. You're all welcome here anytime. And we won't remember anything if any military types start asking questions."

The A-Team loaded into their van and drove off.

This time Faceman was in charge of the map.

 **The End...**


End file.
